Closure

So breaking up is hard to do. Yes it is. It was. Getting over it even harder, but very possible. Time of course helped and distance really helped, but I'm finally there. Because of the circumstances, the cheating and lying that happened in my relationship, it built up and built up inside me until finally I snapped. I kept trying to save the relationship anyway I possibly could. I even told myself we would stay friends, but how would I have been able to be his friend after everything he did. We continued to talk online, chatting everyday and emailing and I kept it going because deep down I guess I was still thinking we could work it out some how. I was just fooling myself and not looking at everything. During one of our last chat conversations, which started out civil, he had to go make a comment about something I had said in an email to him weeks ago and I thought we were done being angry and he started again with the stupid comments and I lost it. I finally just gave it to him. I told him everything that I knew, that he did not know I knew, and I told him what I thought of him, which was not pleasant. I basically tried my hardest to hurt him with words. That was the only weapon I had to hurt him with. He had already hurt me deep inside my soul so I just kept going and going like the energizer bunny and just let him have it. He turned around and had the nerve to tell me that I was horrible and told me that he would never forgive me for it. I laughed. What he did to me was far more hurtful then any of the words that I said to him. I basically stated facts and he could not take it. When I pushed him into the corner all he could do was try and find things to say to make me sound like a horrible person, however he couldn't really find anything true. I was the kindest person to him and his children and I always put him first. He was reaching but never could touch me. So now he hates me and will never forgive me. I can't do anything except laugh again. We are definitely over and I'm so happy about it. I let him steel so much of my heart when he was with me and now I finally got it back. The love I once had for him is gone. I know that deep inside I will always remember him and even still feel a little for him but only because there was a good person inside him sometimes and I was able to see that person come out once in a while but that person changed and became a lying, cheating, manipulator and I'm glad he is out of my life forever. Closure. I needed it.